7 most absurd bollywood songs of all times

Bollywood is an industry which relies geavily upon the success of its music to ultimately derive the success of the films. From time immemorial, music has pretty much been the soul of Bollywood and has gems that make it impossible to even imagine a world of films without songs. Hollywood may have something to say about that, but that's the beauty of Indian cinema. So having said that, it might be close to impossible to do any top 10 list related to music, or in case of best song even a top 100 might seem like unachievable one. However what we can do is probably try and look back at some of the songs which stood out for sheer absurdity of their lyrics, picturization and music.

I will not try to typecast the double meaning songs from Dalaal (Kabootar atariya pe chadhta hi hai) or Choli ke Peeche kya hai (Common teenager knowledge). Not that these songs were not weird but because these cult classics had one or the other way to create a mass appeal (and more because I like these songs, so yahan mai wahi daloonga jo mujhe trash lagta hai, aapko usse kya)

And more or less I am totally going to ignore the contemporary bollywood in which the overall music is absurd. So picking ut some songs like Mohabbat hai Mirchi or Chiggie Wiggie will be hurting the sentiments of the complete industry (no privilege to too much trashy compared to very trashy)

zara zara touch me na, pliss nice sowng

And no popular Govinda songs. Period. They are all good. Whether it is mai tujhko bhaga laya hoon tere ghar se, tere baap ke darr se or Sarkai lo Khatiya jada lage.

A list of those songs was already covered by Filmistani before

aa aa ee, oo oo oo. oo oo oohhhhh

So here's my personal top 10 for the songs (love them or hate them) who I believe are weird/absurd or maybe even trash

1. Garam Garam Chai
There was a movie in 1995 called dance Party (nevermind if you havent heard of it, probably no one ever heard of it. Not even the cast and crew of the fil included) which featured a gem from the God of Gems - baba Sehgal

This is how the song goes

up ke bihar ke mere friend khas friends
chhuk chhuk gaadi mein baithe
raat ke baje the sade gyarah mujhe uhu hu hu sardi lagi
maine bola yaar kunal mujhe de de ek shol
bola aane de pareli station lenge ek samaj gaya
no no no no no
chahiye na koi mujhe aisi waisi dish kash mil jaati mujhe
garam garam chai garam garam chai
The video isn't bad either. Just look at Shakti kapoor #jussayin


2. Din me leti hai, Raat me leti hai
So this one did not feature in the previous cover on double meaning one but it deserves a special mention just for the sheer audacity of the crew which created this song. From the movie Amanat (1994), the song has Kumar Sanu, Ila Arun and Alka Yagnik together creating this magical experience. And who better than Bappi da to create the tunes (with his previous accolades of Dalal and Disco era). The song goes like this

din me leti hai raat me leti hai
subah ko leti hai sham ko leti hai

bas me leti hai bas bas, lokal me leti hai
thiatar me leti hai hotel me leti hai

chhat pe leti hai, kamre me leti hai
bistar me leti hai, khule aam
let ke leti hai, baith ke leti hai



3. Ek rasgulla kahin fat gaya re
Izzatdar (1990) is a remarkable film for so many reasons. Particularly the last scene featuring Dileep sahab and Govinda where Yusuf fights the gangster using a chapati. Yes, you heard it right, a fuckin Chapati. Never underestimate the power of 'Shakti Bhog' . For full pleasure, directly fo to 3:40 on the video

Is bandook me kitni roti hai re? I mean Goli

But that was still not the highest point in the film. It reaches the pinnacle with the song

sun o mister o mister 
sun o mister o mister mister o mister (WTF)
ek rasgulla kahi fat gaya re re baba re
fat ke jalebi se lipat gaya re


4. Maalan tere baag me narangi latke
It doesn't take a rocket scientist to understand that mere presence of Shakti Kapoor in a video sometimes can disgust viewers enough to have a fit. So 'nandu sabka bandu' is not always a pretty sight. But when the backdrop of the movie is a Prabhuji one man show, then the significance of a trashy song always reaches new heights. Inspired from a Rajasthani folk song of the same name, this was a classic in its time and somehow not available on youtube anymore in its original format. But the intent of the song was appalingly apparent.

"Malan tara baag mein nazuk nazuk daal par narangi latke” "Teri narangi sari duniya se hatke"

the original folk is somehow available

5. You are my chicken fry
Bappi da was always known for pulling the rabbit out of the hat but never before had he done the magic like the Chicken Fry. I mean how often would you think of comparing your loved one to a chicken dish. No objectification there, pure poetry. Culinary Poetry at its best. The lyrics of the song go like this

You are my chicken fry
You are my fish fry
Kabhi na kehna kudiye bye bye bye

You are my samosa
You are my masala dosa
Main na kahungi mundiya bye bye bye

This song also got lost in the sands of time and no original video is available for the song, but the lyrics and the music would never go away and will remain forever etched in our memories. The lyrics were 

6. Doodh ban jaoongi, malai ban jaoongi
Bollywood's fascination with kitchen is always apparent. Songs satisfying the apetite in literal sense. This cult song from 1995 film Sarhad, objectifies women differently. Doodh, sharab, kebab, machhi. Full 5 course meal. Sung by no less than Asha Bhosle, this one will remain etched in trashy song lovers mind forever
The video of the song is appropriate as well. Have a look

7. Ladki kaise fansayi jati hai (Kishor Kumar)
The list will end with another legend snging one of the classic songs for Ramsay brothers. Kishor da took the song to another level with his efferevescent style. Samri (1985) is considered one of Ramsay brothers finest and not for nothing. Bappi Da with his heart throbbing music, add to that the brilliant Kishore da and what comes out is this
Filmed on a certain Rajan Sippy, who never achieved the same fame as Puneet Issar or Hemant Birje

Not to mention the movie itself, the first 3D horror film in India. Here's a look at its trailer. 


Hope the list is apetising enough. Let us know if you agree or have something to add to the list

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